In May of 1773 the British passed The Tea Act which called for American merchants to pay a tax of $.03 on a pound of tea. It was only the latest in a series of laws and tariffs that colonists felt were oppressive and arbitrary. The Sons of Liberty put on some swell costumes one night and dumped nearly 400 crates of tea in Boston Harbor. The demonstration became known as the Boston Tea Party. Three years later we declared our independence from England and the rest is, quite literally, history.

The years following could best be described as an uneasy peace but by 1812 the British had become insufferable once more. It was determined that between the years 1803 and 1812, the British Navy had “pressed” more than 10,000 American seamen into service on their ships. The result? President James Madison asked congress for a declaration and the War of 1812 was on in which we kicked major British booty for the second time in 35 years. We won that war too however the British remain largely insufferable to this day, but that’s another column.

On March 6, 1836, General Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna thought he’d break the spirit of Texans by burning a small mission in San Antonio. For three weeks a ragtag contingent of 189 volunteers held his army of over 2000 at bay. Until that day, the battle for Texas independence was not more than a border skirmish to many Americans. While it’s true that all 189 defenders of the Alamo perished, Santa Anna lost more than 1400 troops during the engagement, a crippling loss. Once the story of the massacre of those brave men, women and children at the Alamo became known, Santa Anna found he had bitten off more than he could chew. Texans “remembered the Alamo” well beyond their subsequent victory over Santa Anna at the Battle of San Jacinto.

In 1898 there was little appetite for a war with Spain despite daily dispatches from correspondents in the besieged island nation of Cuba. They reported the plight of Cubans in the wake of Spanish aggression. Many feel that Spain could have continued their course of domination in Cuba and throughout the Caribbean had the U.S.S. Maine not been blown up in Havannah Harbor with the loss of 262 sailors. Soon after, Teddy Roosevelt and his Rough Riders charged up San Juan Hill with their sabers drawn shouting “Remember the Maine”. The Spanish contingent suddenly remembered having left the coffee on back in Cadiz.

Prior to December 7, 1941, many Americans were vehemently opposed to our involvement in what became WWII. But when news of the invasion of Pearl Harbor was broadcast, we united as never before. “The Greatest Generation” led us to a great victory over Axis powers that threatened the entire world. Japan’s Admiral Yamamoto said at the time they had “awakened a sleeping giant” and had thereby assured their own destruction. A prophetic statement indeed.

In October of 1960 Fidel Castro and Nikita Khruschev hatched a scheme to arm Cuba with Russian missiles to be aimed at the heart of this nation. President Kennedy and his staff met that challenge, blockading Cuba and sending Russian ships packing.

In 1986 Libyan dictator and Idi Amin Charm School graduate Mohammar Kadhafi was enjoying a burgeoning career as a wacko despot when a string of terrorist acts was traced to him that earned him a late night visitation of U.S. and British fighter plane rocket attacks that unfortunately failed to ignite his night shirt. It did have the happy outcome of having reduced the Kadhafi gene pool by taking out a few members of his clan.

Speaking of wacko despots, in 1995 Saddam Hussein decided to flex his muscles and invade the neighboring country of Kuwait in an attempt to unburden that nation of its oil resources and zoo animals. Within days his “elite” Republican Guard units were throwing up their hands so fast in front of American tanks and humvees that they resembled the Baghdad road production of “Showboat”.

So whether Americans are left to stand over a smoldering church, a sunken fleet or a fallen skyscraper, we have a richly deserved reputation for looking up from such visions with an odd set to our eye, a cocked fist, and a terrible resolve that is intrinsically woven into the fabric of our nation.

Why this rehash of U.S. history?

Simple.

I wrote it for Osama bin Laden.

Apparently nobody told him what a really bad idea it was to piss us off.